The Vent / Living

You are not a single mother, you are a widowed mother. Big difference!

Score: 134

I saw so much shredded rubber on the side of I-20 to Augusta yesterday that I could open a recycled tire plant and probably make a profit!

Score: 69

Chris Brown, you need to fire whomever advised you to wear that hyper-conservative blue bowtie on Larry King. You're trying too hard and we see through you.

Score: 65

I remember when I thought Vivica A Fox was da bomb! Then she came on Dancing With The Stars and acted so ghetto, I was actually embarrassed for ever being a fan. So, I've shifted all that adoration to Vanessa Williams.

Score: 52

I don't understand people who go to a concert at the Botanical Gardens without even knowing who the band is. The Los Lobos show was sold out, and real fans couldn't get tickets because you wanted to sit in your high-backed chairs, talk to your friends, and diminish the experience for those who were there for the band!

Score: 46

I like the boxes of wine, but how do I fit them in my wine rack?

Score: 19

When I see Billy Mays on TV now I simply think of him as a big, loud cocaine abuser.

Score: -28

I used to beat up kids like Glenn Beck when I was in school.

Score: -83